Emotional Abuse Marriage

The mystery of two hearts is something that is not understood by many. Only the two who love each other know why they feel the need to love that one particular person for the rest of their lives. We find it wonderful when two people decide to get married. The excitement weddings bring into people’s lives will have you believing that love and relationships are the greatest goals one can achieve in life. We observe newlyweds with awe and celebrate their unions with pomp and color. Everyone has a naïve approach towards marriage, that if you love each other it would be enough but soon newlyweds encounter challenges that love cannot kiss or wish away.

Unveiling Emotional Abuse in Marriage

When there is emotional abuse in marriage the parties involved are vulnerable hurt and confused. The reality of what happened to the beautiful relationship they had seems a far-off fantasy. Emotional abuse in marriage has two parties the abuser who inflicts the pain and the victim who receives the ill-treatment. There are always two sides to a story and understanding both sides helps create a clear picture of what an emotionally abusive marriage is and what people endure for (love’s sake).

Emotional abuse in marriage is defined as when one person exposes or subjects the other spouse to behavior that may cause physiological trauma that would cause anxiety, chronic depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder. The main characteristics that are associated with such abuse of power imbalance are abusive marriages, bullying at work or school, and child abuse.

There are many ways that doctors and researchers use to classify emotional abuse and they are as follows

1. Verbal aggression

   When one partner says something that would hurt and annoy the other spouse and does not apologize for the remarks.
   

2. Dominant behavior
   

   When one spouse refuses the other to have contact with friends or family members and will not allow them to speak or see their loved ones.
   

3. Jealous behavior
   

   When one spouse accuses the other of having other relations outside their marriage.

4. Domestic abuse
   

   This is defined as chronic mistreatment in marriages that includes emotionally abusive behavior.

Confronting Emotional Abusers

The abuser reacts to the love they are given with suspicions and harsh words that leave their spouses emotionally damaged and their self-esteem shattered leaving them feeling helpless and unloved. According to Doctor Phil, a relationship expert an abuser is a coward and a bully as they choose to attack their spouses where they feel safe and protected with no one to question their actions. Abusers are misguided about how they go about getting what they want. Instilling fear by degrading and belittling your spouse to get your way things like respect are commanded not demanded. He also urges abusers to be proactive instead of being reactive to situations and they should take responsibility for their actions instead of finding excuses for their actions and words.

Doctor Phil also asks the victim to take responsibility for their role as they should play a role in letting the abuser know how they feel when they are treated in an abusive way. They should also let their spouses know that they will not allow them to treat them in such a way anymore. Sit down and discuss what is acceptable and what is not. This way the abuser will know what is expected from them. The doctor puts it there are no victims only volunteers this indicates that if you’re in an emotionally abusive marriage and you have never stood up for yourself and said enough then you’re partly responsible for the damage you in.